2784 replies to this topic

[invalidusername]

Did it sort of feel like you were suddenly sucked out of your body by some sort of vacuum AJ?

[Axlejames]

It felt like I was sitting there paying attention listening to my wife and then I kind of like almost dozed kind of feeling then bam i was met with sheer panic.and everything got louder. 

[fishinghat]

Been there done that. I had a lot of that in the later stages of Cymbalta withdrawal. Sometimes I would calm down after 16 or 20 minutes, sometimes hours. Luckily these events faded with time.

[Axlejames]

Been there done that. I had a lot of that in the later stages of Cymbalta withdrawal. Sometimes I would calm down after 16 or 20 minutes, sometimes hours. Luckily these events faded with time.

Well that is good to know as I believe I am in the later stages of Lamotragine and Zoloft withdrawl Huh

[fishinghat]

I would agree.

[invalidusername]

Yup had similar things when my GP made the genius move of having me taper off Celexa in 2 weeks a few years back. Except mine usually happened in the supermarket..

[Axlejames]

Yup had similar things when my GP made the genius move of having me taper off Celexa in 2 weeks a few years back. Except mine usually happened in the supermarket 

sorry to hear this bud I dont think doctors understand sometimes how difficult it becomes when we get cut off abruptly. Thank you for the insight

[invalidusername]

No - they don't.. otherwise our little forum wouldn't be here

[Axlejames]

And now I am back to feeling neutral not exactly happy but not anxious neither. Not sad or depressed just neutral. Its strange I feel like I have been chasing this feeling now that I am here it feels akward un natural what is this ? Has anyone had this experience before any ideas on how I can navigate this or use this to help me grow. 

[fishinghat]

Just the normal swing in neurotransmitters. these swings will slowly get farther apart and less severe. Your body is working hard to get stability and will figure it out in time.

[invalidusername]

That feeling comes and goes... neutral, flat, apathetic... call it what you will, but everyone has those sort of days once in a while, we - being more aware of our emotions - are just more aware of it than others.

 

I have been going through a phase of exactly that for 6 days now. Fortunately, today was better.

[Axlejames]

I was talking to my dr yesterday about how there are things I would like to do but when I think about them it just seems like a chore to even try and do them. Things that might make me happy. He says thats your depression I didnt even realize I was depressed but apparently I am. Any ideas on ways I can get out of this funk ?

[fishinghat]

I really hate to disagree with him but...

 

If you were depressed you wouldn't care about much, be reclusive/withdrawn and usually sleep a lot. Also depression isn't usually a part of benzo withdrawal except after a period of anxiety. If you were truly depressed you would more than likely know it. People suffering from anxiety or withdrawal often fear a project or pressure to do something. They worry about it setting off an anxiety episode or getting them out of their comfort zone. 

[invalidusername]

Hmmmm... I would come down in the middle here. What you have AJ is apathy. Depression is a bit more than that usually as Hat said. Apathy generally comes after moment of fatigue and overdoing things. I would say that this will pass. If it is sort of sitting there in the background - you can get on with things, but you just don't want to and you haven't had this for lengths of time before, I would say it will pass. 

 

Sometimes people such as us forget that life is never perfect and we are forever judging ourselves against our emotions. Forever scoring ourselves... how am I doing now? What about now? Am I better than earlier? Don't beat yourself up over it because that will only make it worse, but continued distraction will help it pass. Your brain needs to learn your "normal" again.

 

It is tough, but you need to keep doing these things. If you are to start enjoying them again, and you aren't doing them, then how are you going to know that you enjoy them again?!

[Axlejames]

Thank you both and what you guys say here makes wayyy more sense then being depressed normally I know when get that way and IUN i have been run down lately especially after those panic attacks so apathy makes sense.

[invalidusername]

Always here for you AJ - hope you are getting on well with Shaun...

[Axlejames]

I was getting a massage the other day and something some kind of voice came into my head and maybe I am just imagining it I don't know but it told me I would be anxiety free for 10 years then at the ten year mark 1/4 of it will return then 10 years after that 1/2 10 years after that 3/4. it was very strange not even sure why I would think this what does it mean? Could it be God could it be true?

[fishinghat]

If it was God you can bet it was true. One thing about it, at my age I wouldn't be concerned as I wouldn't live that long. lol

 

I don't know what to make of that AJ. Time will tell I guess.

[invalidusername]

Interesting one. I sometimes receive messages, but it is not a voice, they are thought-forms. Pictures that tell me something, rather than words.

 

Personally, I don't think it would be the intention for God to be the bearer of such news. Whilst I believe that we have set goals to achieve whilst we are here, we still have free reign over out actions which will change the course of our lives. If the future was decided, there would be no real justification in our being here as we would not learn.

 

Not sure if that helps being from a spiritualist perspective, but just my 10 cents.

 

Hat... you will probably outlive me the way I handle stress... so don't go thinking you are getting out that easily

[Axlejames]

Something strange has been happening this week. It feels like my body wants to be anxious but I just cant seem to get there. It is a strange feeling as soon as i feel a bit anxious which happens its like I can sub consciously tell myself that everything is OK and not to fret. I am not one to whole heartedly jump to a spiritual explanation but something definitely has happened for me. I am doing well I hope that you all are as well. Lots of love 

 

Chris

[invalidusername]

Great news AJ!

 

There could be that little battle for control going on in your head as you are used to the anxiety taking control, so part of your brain is expecting something bad to happen. But keep going - this is just the start! I have done loads of things outside what was my comfort zone this week. The anxiety is just a bad dream now. It happens - and it will happen for you brother!

[Axlejames]

Update #2  Things are actually going well for a change I still feel a tinge of what I would call anxiety but for some reason it seems like it rests at the back of my mind rather at the front. I wouldnt say that I am happy but not sad not neutral either the best way I can describe this is I feel OK. I am grateful for all that you do for me thanks for listening. 

[fishinghat]

Wonderful, you may still have some down turns but they should be minimal. Keep us posted. 

[invalidusername]

Agreed. Be prepared for things to go back and forth, but all the while knowing that this is normal for everyone. No-ones life is perfect!!

[Axlejames]

Been feeling a bit depressed lately considering going back on medication. I dont know if I can keep handling these ups and downs. I know what I felt a few weeks ago but now its like I am back to being anxious. I have noticed I have a health anxiety anytime i feel a tinge of something physical i freak and think I am going to die. I need help not sure what I should do should I go back on meds or ..... not sure. 

[fishinghat]

The health anxiety is typical of antidepressant withdrawal. The neurotransmitters involved effect the hippocampus which is the center for fear and paranoia. This should fade as you become more stable. At least you are getting occasional swings to the 'feel good' side.

[Axlejames]

The health anxiety is typical of antidepressant withdrawal. The neurotransmitters involved effect the hippocampus which is the center for fear and paranoia. This should fade as you become more stable. At least you are getting occasional swings to the 'feel good' side.

Huh I didnt know that interesting then I will hold out a little longer I suppose it hast been a full year since ive been off either med. 

[frog]

Axle, just my 2 cents for whatever its worth. If you're unsure then just press on without meds and see. I don't think you should go on meds until you're sure there is no other way. 

 

I questioned the same thing manyyyy times over the past year. And I just kept telling myself that I can literally go on a medication any day, any time. There is no pressure to make the decision today, or tomorrow, or this week. So I would say to myself, well let's wait another month and reassess. If nothing at all has changed by then then maybe it's time. And you know what? The time just never came. There were always changes and improvements as I looked back. I am not 100% perfect today after a year but I'm well enough that I know I can push through without meds. Your answer might end up being different than mine, and that's totally ok too! But you don't have to decide today

[Axlejames]

Thank you this is something I can do. 

Axle, just my 2 cents for whatever its worth. If you're unsure then just press on without meds and see. I don't think you should go on meds until you're sure there is no other way. 

 

I questioned the same thing manyyyy times over the past year. And I just kept telling myself that I can literally go on a medication any day, any time. There is no pressure to make the decision today, or tomorrow, or this week. So I would say to myself, well let's wait another month and reassess. If nothing at all has changed by then then maybe it's time. And you know what? The time just never came. There were always changes and improvements as I looked back. I am not 100% perfect today after a year but I'm well enough that I know I can push through without meds. Your answer might end up being different than mine, and that's totally ok too! But you don't have to decide today

[fishinghat]

One thing you can do AJ is to keep track of the good days and the bad days. With time you can see a pattern. If things seem to be getting better stick with it. If the pattern shows no sign of improvement after a couple months then you might want to rethink things.

 

One thing I learned a long time ago, when in withdrawal you can not trust your memory or your perception of how you are doing. You must keep some good records.