Freesoon, thanks for your words - and I especially like your mother's expression. Definitely gonna be using and reflecting on that thought often.
And Cloudy...OMG. Sending out hugs of comfort and understanding to you. I'm sorry you're having it - extremely - rough, by your description. Seriously. My heart goes out to you for what you're suffering. But you are surviving this, you're still here, and you're not nuts. You hang in there. You are obviously made of tougher stuff than I am. I am realizing, after reading your post, that I have only had a mere taste of some of your withdrawal symptoms - and that was bad enough.
In fact (still in hospital at the moment), I just woke up from a really awful dream. And kinda don't wanna go back to sleep yet because I don't want it to pick up where it left off. I was gonna vent in a post here and complain, hahaha. But then I saw your post and changed my mind.
I think it's a fact that to one degree or another, we each are going to be enduring terrible suffering as we all try to get ourselves off this Cymbalta poison. I am now finishing my 3rd week, having quit cold turkey. I have had nearly every symptom you've mentioned having, off and on in that time - some episodes being longer and/or worse than others. And I have to do what FiveNotions suggested to you, ALL the damn time. That is, constantly reminding myself when experiencing these awful episodes, that they are happening expressly because of the body/brain trying to cope and 'rewire' itself, as FiveNotions explained. ( and thank you, FiveNotions for sharing with us. Since finding this forum, I have gleaned a lot of strength and hope from you, and always look forward to reading your posts).
At any rate, I am realizing also that although I have been having a 'mild' time of it since stopping Cymbalta - I do wrestle with the distinct possibility that the worst may lie ahead for me. I mean, I'm trying to avoid ruminating over that thought - but it is something I'm developing a hyper-awareness about...and it frightens me.
Like tonight for example, the nightmare was awful. About subjects totally foreign and irrelevant to my life in every way, but like going to a horror movie when you hate horror movies (which I do. Haha) and not only having to watch, but also being forced (via crazy withdrawal of the drug) to participate in it. I mean, I'm thinking "is this gonna be a regular thing from now on and I just have to adjust?" No way to know but just shut my eyes and go through this.
Also, now that I've refused to take any pain meds from my Dr this week, my leg and joint pain seems to be intensifying. Really have been uncomfortable tonight, but refuse to put any more drug crap in my body to cope with it. I am adamant about not going back to Cymbalta, even for a few beads at a time. (I seriously do admire ALL of you who are going off or have gone off Cymbalta in the sensible way - by doing the beads. And maybe I've been unwise to do it cold turkey. But what's done is done. I've come three weeks out of the Cymbalta fog, and I cannot bring myself to go back and put a single bead of that crap back in. I'm determine to keep riding these symptom waves as they come up, not knowing how much worse they may or may not get for me as I put more and more distance between myself and this drug.)
But I'm thankful I am finding camaraderie and strength with my fellow sufferers here. With us all hanging tough together, we can beat this thing and banish it from our lives forever.
I think I also digress a lot more when I speak, post-Cymbalta, haha. Constantly having a point, yet constantly losing my point. And although that may be a trivial symptom by comparison to the more horrible ones, I still blame Cymbalta for it because in my pre-Cymbalta days I rarely experienced that. Was used to being fairly articulate, clear-headed and sharp...but now feel like a space cadet most of the time. Oh well. If I learn nothing else through this entire experience, I will be learning patience with myself.
