1908 replies to this topic

[thismoment]

Hi blueyegirl49

 

Welcome!!

 

Ditto on what TFL said. Sounds like you need to stay at 30 until you stabilize (brain zaps is not stable)- as TFL said, sounds like you dropped from 60 to 30 quickly, like over a couple of weeks.

 

You can get through this, and there are many compassionate and knowledgeable people like TFL here to help; we've all been there.

[Carleeta]

Blueyegirl49...welcome to the forum.  Seems like you may have just jumped off Cymbalta instead of weaning..  this could definitely be the cause of your brain zaps...Are they strong? Do they happen at certain times of the day? Are they associated with any body pain..You will get through this like many of us have and are on our way to a Cymbalta free like..  Things take time and many members here are always around to help you through all of this....Wishing you the best. 

[Carleeta]

12:28...arrived home from all events I attended tonight, and I am positively exhausted. Thank you Tryinginfl for your

 

Carleeta...

 

Wonderful to hear from you!!  Sorry about your back issues - apparently you are getting much better judging from your plans for a wild weekend! 

 

Have a great time and enjoy your family!

 

You certainly could run circles around me - even with your bad back...

 

Love and hugs,

Liz

tryinginfl...I wasn't getting better while making the centerpieces...lol lol I was getting high anxiety on top of the pain...lol lol It was when my family arrived from Florida I was able to do just nothing..That is when I took a flexeril and was knocked out for 2 days and rested fully...Not all the pain in gone but the worse one was a muscle which they believe I strained or pulled and kept aggravating it because I cant sit still too long...lol lol I am still having upper back pain, although it comes and goes when Im sitting too long or standing to long...Ive always been a super active person and I now need to slow myself down and just trust that things will get done by others if I cant do them..This way I can  go out and enjoy what I want to be doing....lol lol....missed you

[TryinginFL]

Carleeta...

 

Just an idea - have you given any thought to massage therapy?  It just might help...  I find it a great way to loosen the muscles. 

 

Yes, I'm sure it IS difficult for you to sit still!

 

My best wishes that you will be feeling your "super self" very soon

 

Enjoy the rest of your weekend...

 

Liz

[FiveNotions]

BlueEyeGirl, welcome! I never could have gotten off the crapalta if not for the wonderful folks here, and we'll do everything we can to help you, too!

[Carleeta]

Tryinginfl. ..great advise...I love massage therapy...need to see if pain management doctor will suggest it..need to take X rays next week and then see pain management md. Won't take it upon myself to go have a message just incase...lol lol. Thanks you TryinginFl..

[FiveNotions]

Reporting in with my positive for yesterday ... maybe the whole week .... went with a friend for an evening walk/picnic/oldies concert to a new riverfront area along the Anacostia River here in DC ... lovely breeze off the river cooled down our awful hot/muggy weather ... watched the sailboats, tons of young families with tons of young children playing ... huge full moon reflecting on the water... an oldies rock group playing renditions of favorite songs... they weren't very good musicians, but they let the children come up on the bandstand and watch them play, so we all applauded them mostly for that!

Got home about 10:30 pm and slept through the whole night (except for the obligatory "bathroom runs").... what a delight, after getting just about 3 hrs sleep on Thursday ;-)

I'm taking the weekend off from my job search efforts (had devolved into mostly stressing/worrying and no real action), and will start fresh on Monday ...

Carleeta, it is just so great to have you, and your "LOLs" and "yippeeees" back !!

[TryinginFL]

Carleeta....

 

When you go to your pain management dr. ask about the massage therapy - down here many of the drs. will write a prescription for it.  I get a prescription every 90 days and the insurance will cover!

 

Good luck...

[Carleeta]

Tryinginfl. .Thank you...I will definitely inquire about this with him...

[brzghoff]

Tonight's Positive: The Moon!

 

Its a perigree moon, meaning its the closest to earth in its eliptical cycle and its gonna look large! This one is called a Full Buck Moon. See link below. Here's hoping it clear in your neck of the woods. Moonrise is about 8:15 this evening. might wanna double check for your specific locale. 

 

http://www.csmonitor...-Full-Buck-Moon

[Wagtail]

Carleeta , better late than never I guess....
Welcome home , good to hear from you & about all your adventures . You exhaust me just by reading what you do .
I'm still having good days but ALWAYS followed by a NOT so good day if I get over excited or tired ... Hoping & praying that this will one day get better too.
8 months Cymbalta free now so I'm crossing my fingers that I will soon be anxiety free & get to enjoy doing things again .
So happy for you that you are able to do so much ....a real positive for you . :-))

[thismoment]

The moon is 226220 miles from the earth at this full moon. If you drive toward it at 100 mph in your Chevy, you'll get there in 94 days! However if you could travel at the speed of light you'd get there in 1.2 seconds!

[Flossy]

I'm realizing it's good days and bad days! Yesterday I thought the worst was over, today, not so much! Staying positive though )

[FiveNotions]

Wagtail, where's your avatar, the lovely pic of you?

TM, the information you come up/out with is just amazing ...

Flossy, yep ... and when we have the good day(s) we think they'll never end... and ditto for the bad day(s) ... just keep on keepin' on... you're doing great!

[Carleeta]

12:10 pm...positively cooking for the family post race party . spectacular 15 k...The wheelchair competitors really took my heart more than the elite runners...The wheelchair athletes, with no legs and using their arms for over 9 miles..They have overcome such obstacles and live their disabled life to the fullest and beyond...I realize my obstacles are not even obstacles. .I positively have nothing to complain about...Have a wonderful day everyone...need to finish preparing food for my family's victory and post race party..

[Bethhalffull]

Greetings to all. I recently found this site and it I am deeply grateful to all of you for your generosity and help. I weaned myself off of the poison over a period of about five months, and stopped entirely about six months ago.

I am just recovering from wild emotional overreaction. It was only a few weeks ago that I was despairing, on a bad day, that my brain would never again be under my control. Perhaps that is a weird way to put it. (Will we ever figure out who/what is in control of our brains?). Control is probably too much to expect. I was afraid that I would not recover from the irrational responses that I was suffering from, and the pain that I felt might never get better. I 'd have a better day and then right back to worse.

I am speaking in the past tense. I am not "cured," but the edge is off. The wildness has moderated. I found myself a counselor a couple of months ago. She is a very kind person. She listens to me cry, rant, pontificate, whine...she is not an expert on psychotropic drug withdrawal (or she wasn't before she started to listen to me) but she listens and thinks clearly. She recommends strategies to cope. It has helped me a lot to have a weekly appointment to talk about my situation and see where I am.

After the first time I saw her she prepared a list of shrinks if I wanted to see one. I was panicky and thought about taking a drug to get off the drug so I made an appointment. I had the opportunity to talk to this shrink on the phone while making the appointment and could see that she knew less about withdrawal than I had learned from my reading. So I eventually cancelled the appointment.

I was on ssri meds for at least 25 years. 120 mg of cymbalta for about the last 5. Perhaps weaning saved me from some physical withdrawal symptoms. I also exercise, about four times a week, workout and tennis. I have had diarrhea, and still do. Don't know what to do about that. Never had it before except with stomach flu. I had the brain zaps. They are almost gone. Maybe once or twice a week now. I still prefer to mostly keep to myself, but I have two kids, one still at home so I am not able to be a hermit.

I took the meds for chronic depression. Anxiety has not been a significant issue for me.

So this is me. I appreciate knowing from other's stories that there is hope. I want my story to be here for others. If anyone has any recommendations for my diarrhea problem please let me know. I look forward to sharing more about myself and my journey.

[thismoment]

Hi Beth

 

Welcome!

 

I will follow up later with a proper response, but I wanted to shake your hand. You've been through a lot, but you have remarkable strength and that has clearly enabled you to pull through this. This is discontinuation, as you know, but you are on the safe side.

 

Be sure the diarrhea doesn't have another cause other than discontinuation, but of course it could be discontinuation. You might change your diet for a while to preclude gluten intolerance, lactose intolerance etc. 

 

Talk to you in a bit.

[Carleeta]

Hello Beth, welcome to the forum and ty for sharing you with drawl symptoms with everyone here. I agree with TV on your remarkable strength and courage..You will be a great asset to others here in giving them hope through their withdrawal journey.

Please keep us posted on your progress. As for the loose bowel, I also agree to check into other possibilities of what could be causing this...Not everything is discontinuation symdrome...Being a female means hormonal changes all our lives..This could also be dietary...Keep track of what you are eating and when mostly the loose bowel occurs...Bananas are a good natural source to help aid in loose bowel (diahrea)..I'm hesitant to use the term diahrea due to it being viral or bacterial and usually accompanied with a fever...Therefore, loose bowel is what I'm questing you are experiencing. .

Best of luck in your healing process. ..Thank you again!

[TryinginFL]

Welcome Beth! 

 

We're so happy that you found us!  You will find much support, caring and knowledge from the wonderful folks here.  I am now over 6 months off cold turkey and the people here have become like family to me.

 

Congratulations on getting off this miserable poison - it sure takes a lot of determination and plain 'ol guts! 

 

Did you wean off the poison using bead counting?  Hopefully, not cold turkey!  I wouldn't recommend that to anyone.  I hope that you will read through some of our forums as there is much useful info there and you can follow our journeys to hell and back!

 

A wise choice being in therapy - and better not a psychiatrist, as all they want to do is push more drugs on you.  It amazed me at first how much more one can learn on this forum than from drs!   Most have no idea of the withdrawal syndrome and their idea of weaning is having one jump down 30 mgs at a time, all the while creating a cold turkey withdrawal.

 

I can't help with the diarrhea issue - if it has been going on for months, you might want to check with your GP. 

 

Again, welcome and soon others will be chiming in - there are others with more knowledge than I and you will meet them.  Hang in there and please keep us posted! 

[Wagtail]

12:10 pm...positively cooking for the family post race party . spectacular 15 k...The wheelchair competitors really took my heart more than the elite runners...The wheelchair athletes, with no legs and using their arms for over 9 miles..They have overcome such obstacles and live their disabled life to the fullest and beyond...I realize my obstacles are not even obstacles. .I positively have nothing to complain about...Have a wonderful day everyone...need to finish preparing food for my family's victory and post race party..

Carleeta it's so good that you have recovered so well & full of energy ... If I overdo things one day then I spend the next few days going through withdrawals again ... I must have a hell of a lot of Cymbalta stored in all my fat cells .
I could never do what you're doing & Ive been off Cymbalta for 8 months now !...
I still pray that I will recover ...xxx

[Clara]

Hi beth and welcome! Thanks so much for sharing your Cymbalta story and keep us posted!

[blueyegirl49]

Thanks everyone My dr told me to take it for two weeks from 60 to 30 then off but then the withdrawals were bad.  I went to the ER and the dr there said to wean off more slowly so I went from 30's every second day for two weeks then every third day for two weeks now have been off for almost a week.  Daily brain zaps and not feeling the best.  Hoping as time goes by it will get better.

[TryinginFL]

Blueeyegirl...

 

You are in cold turkey withdrawal!  You have been putting yourself in and out of withdrawal by taking the poison every other day and then every 3rd day - every day you didn't take it you were in withdrawal!  I would suggest you go back on the 30 and slowing wean off by using the bead counting method.  Please check out the forum on "Bead Counting".  We also have members here who can help you as they have done this - it is much more gentle on the mind and body.  When you mention daily brain zaps you are definitely in withdrawal, girl!  Just jumping down from 60 to 30 was a major factor in the cold turkey withdrawal.  

 

The ER doc was wrong - that is not gentle "weaning".  Unfortunately he has no knowledge of what this withdrawal is like - most of them don't.  They are jackasses!

 

I will call on FishingHat to carry on from here - he is our expert on bead counting!  He has helped many of our members to wean off this crap with as little damage as possible...

 

Please consider this - it will be so much easier on you!  I wish you luck and please keep posting what you are feeling...

[fishinghat]

Welcome BG49.  TFL is absolutely right. When you take doses on an everyother day basis you are repeating the same withdrawal over and over. ONe day you take a capsule and the next day you don't. By the 3nd of the day you don't take a capsule it has been 24 hours since the last dose. Cymbalta has a 12 hour half life so by the end of that 48 hours your system has only around 6% of the cymbalta left in it. That creates a wicked withdrawal. So what does the dr have you do next? Well he has you take another capsule, your blood level goes back up and the 48 hour swing starts all over again.

 

Bead counting is where you open the cymbalta capsule each day and remove a few beads, usually 2 or 3. So the first day you remove 3 beads, the next day 6 beads, the next 9 beads etc. This provides for a slow steady withdrawal. If symptoms get to bad you just hold at that dosage for a while until you stabilize. Then start dropping again. Be aware that for most the last few beads give the worse withdrawal. Be prepared to slow down when you get to the very end. Now this is just an example. Some can only remove 1 bead a day and others 7 or 8 beads a day. You will have to play with it a little bit to find what works for you. This doesn't mean you won't have withdrawal but it will be lighter and you will have some control over it.

[thismoment]

Blueyegirl49

 

You did a very fast unconventional withdrawal (steep dosage drops and blank days with no drug), so you can anticipate symptoms and some weeks of struggle yet. As time goes by you WILL feel better, but it will take some time. I could be a number of months. 

 

You do have the option of re-instating on the drug until you feel stable (might take a couple of weeks), and then plan a long slow taper (with no steps- steep dosage drops or skipped days) over several months. Or stay as you are and weather the storm. We will be here to help.

 

Please ask questions and we'll do our best to answer them.

[FiveNotions]

I'm with TFL and FH on this, BlueEyeGirl.... I went cold turkey, it's not fun. And the way your doc has you doing it might even be harder ... constant ups and downs in dosing... it's just jerking your poor brain around like crazy...

Get stable on the last dose where you felt okay, then count beads down from there.

You can do this!

[thismoment]

Bethhalffull

 

I see you weaned off C in 5 months and have been off for 6 months. You've been encountering some wave action (up-and-down of symptoms of good and bad days), but that's pretty normal, and the wave action diminishes and it eventually becomes ripples. 

 

I totally understand about questioning who or what's in charge of your brain- that's a question philosophers and (more recently) neuroscientists have been grappling with in earnest! Coming off these drugs evokes a lot of questions because we see our brains performing in unusual ways.

 

I'm glad to hear "the edge is off", because that will help you keep the stress down. Stress makes symptoms feel worse, last longer, and it may affect the quality of the repair/recovery.

 

You started SSRIs right at the creation of these meds 25 or so years ago- are you taking any other medication now? It will be impossible to tell how your brain used to be, and trying to emulate a mind state from the past isn't reasonable; take the good brain you've got and move on. 

 

The subject of control of the brain is an interesting one- it somehow implies that there are two brains, one controlling the other.  ". . . I was despairing. . . that my brain would never again be under my control."  I think the brain is the brain: it begins with genetic potential- but it's build by its history, and it's only capable of responding based upon its history- default mind states are determined by experience. It's a physical system entirely beholden to the physical laws of the universe; therefore the effect of these drugs is physical- they physically alter the brain and the repair process of discontinuation is also physical in nature. It's trial-and-error since your brain has no manual (no history) for this repair; therefore it's not perfect. But pretty damn close which is amazing!

 

You are doing so well and I'm glad to hear you have a therapist that you like- that really helps.

 

Take care.

[Carleeta]

10:15 am..my positive today is I've watered my plants and filled my humming feeders...My humming birds are getting bigger by the day..lol lol...Now off to change my Internet equipment due to unstable service since the tornado touch down in our area last week...Have a great morning to all of you!

[FiveNotions]

Hey Carleeta ... I got a chuckle visualizing your big, fat, too chubby to fly anymore, hummingbirds... have you been feeding them that yummy lasagna of yours? :-D

My positive for today is that I'm about to get "gussied up" and head downtown to the Daughters of the American Revolution library and drop off a resume for a couple of positions they have open ... I'm over qualified for both, but am hoping that if I can just see the librarian on duty and chat, I'll be able to convey that I'm an "old fart" librarian, looking for a gig where I can be of use... not for career advancement... and that they would benefit by hiring me rather than a fresh out of school librarian ...

I'm even going to put on mascara ... this is war, baby!

[xman]

After reading Beth's story and catching up with my friends I am just positive we will endure to perhaps start a new chapter in our lives.