85 replies to this topic

[LowMo]

Mine has been pretty good- my mother suffered from depression, and although I have not been treating her very well lately, she has stood by me.
My dad doesn't understand but keep saying he loves me and hopes I feel better. (gee dad me too!)

[chuckiesd]

I'm not having a problem for cymbalta. But all my parents and family will help me if i got any problem. Fo most important thing is, please be always with your family. Your family is the 1st thing you need care. Do not make your family is number 3 / 4 or more. From that you will help you in any problem.

[Heather Church]

I thought that things would be o.k. in the beginning but my family's patients for me is becomming less and less. I cry everyday most days more than once. Feeling this way and trying to deal with other life obstacles is next to impossible. It has been a few days since I have written anything about what has been going on because sometimes it makes the reality a little more painful. I would suggest keeping a journal though or just checking in on a cymbalta withdrawl website because once you do..... you feel a bit of relief. I would say that the support of my family is poor right now, which makes this even harder to deal with. My husband gets fed up with my anger and so he has been very sarcastic lately and sometimes my mom says a few sarcasting things herself. I think one of the things that bothers me the most is when they try to delicately ask me whem I'm going to start trying a new anti-depressant. Are you kidding me? I know it isn't easy for my family to deal with me right now but a little understanding would help! I feel that I can't take another day feeling so sick, sad and and angry! It has been more than 3 weeks of HELL and the cymbalta is still hiding in my body, somedays it attacks me more than others. I still don't understand why or how this is happening but I'm trying to keep positive that it will eventually come to an end. Try to stay positive everyone and maybe we should encourage our families to read more about cymbalta withdrawls everyday.

Heather

:evil: this is how I feel all the time!

[Sarah J]

Heather - perhaps you can benefit from the nightmare I just went through coming off of Cymbalta. I did what my previous doctor said - I went from 30 mg down to nothing. My OLD shrink told me to "tough it out, I will eventually feel better". After 45 days of hearing this, I decided it was time for a second opinion. I was losing my mind and feeling probably similar to how you do now.

I questioned the new psychiatrist about how a SUCCESSFUL Cymbalta wean should go.

She said: If the dosage is reduced slowly and correctly, you should feel slight withdrawal (never uncomfortable to the point where you feel like you are losing your mind) for the first week and relief by the middle of the second. If you go longer and feel like you are losing your mind and can't control your emotions, you need to stabilize yourself, my new shrink did not recommend my going back on Cymbalta because if I did and tried to discontinue, I would probably have a hard time again.

I am not a doctor, but the new and old doctor said that the Cymbalta leaves your body in 3 to 5 days. Cymbalta is out of your body now. What is going on is that your brain receptors are not able to fire correctly. I sincerely hope that you can allow yourself to be put on a SMALL dose of another less invasive anti-depressant to balance yourself out. I was feeling better the day after I took the first dose of the Celexa. My new doctor is working with me to wean me off slowly.

So, from my new doctor's advice above and my personal experience, please know that if you are feeling as badly as you say, it could be very beneficial for you to do a medical switch to another anti-depressant, balance out and wean slowly. I am so grateful that I did and in researching Celexa, (which, buy the way is a Sam's Club $4 prescription for 30 days) it does not seem to have the nightmarish withdrawal syndrome that the dreaded Cymbalta does. I feel so much better now and hopeful that in the next month or so, I will be anti-depressant free. The Celexa did not even hurt my head, make me feel sick or anything like Cymbalta did in the beginning.

You are at three weeks, without some sort of support, this could continue, I pray for you that it doesn't, but please, do not suffer, as my new doctor said, if you aren't feeling significantly better by 3 weeks, it only means that your brain chemistry is having a really hard time readjusting, it does not mean you are not a strong person, you are a strong person for holding out this long. A very strong person and I do admire you for making it this long if you feel anything like I did. You do not deserve to feel that way and have the right to work through this with some support. A strong steely will is great, but at 3 weeks, please get some support. A good doctor will not make you take more Cymbalta after coming this long off of it. Many people on the forum have "switched" successfully using Prozac. My new shrink did not want to use Prozac because I was so "agitated" from my brains not firing properly for almost a month and a half.

Best of luck to you, and please, I understand, I was in your shoes a few weeks ago, refusing to NEVER again take another anti-depressant, but just got to the point where I knew that my brain was not going to make it all alone without some help. And now that I have it, I wish that I did not wait 45 days. A few more days and I think I would have ended up in the hospital.

Please let us all know how you are doing. Please, don't do what I did. With some help and the strong will you have already demonstrated, you will be feeling better soon.

[That1TyGuy]

I'm not currently suffering from Cymbalta but also trying to learn a little bit about it and try to provide some comfort to those that do. I feel that family is the most important thing during a time like this and a supporting one makes the time of getting off of it and trying to get better the best. I hope everyone has the luxery of this.

[cstrommer]

Well, my husband is not too supportive. He doesn't understand my mood swings - well he does, in a way. He says I need to "take a pill". But he also agrees that I need to stop cymbalta. We had a fight last night. He has a tendency to call my names under his breath, and then when I "EXPLODE" I'm the one who's nuts. I hate the verbal abuse when we fight.

I have been dealing with chronic pain for almost 3 years. He's not too sensitive. He gets nasty when we fight. But when we're not fighting, he can be great to hang out with. It's a love/hate relationship. I love him, but I hate living with him. He doesn't help me too much (except the laundry -which he rubs in my face all the time). I really could use some help cleaning (because of the pain).

I need to get a job, so I can get my life back in order. And hire some help. This cymbalta thing is crazy. I would walk away from him, or let it got before, now I just want to scream right in his face!!!!!

[Sarah J]

Men want a quick fix when they are confused, dealing with their wife, who they do want you to feel well, healthy and happy. Your husband might be frustrated that he can't find the "quick fix" to help you, his wife.

My husband used to do the "take a pill" or "you are a psycho" thing. These approaches have helped my husband and I communicate a little better:

1) Remind him that nobody gets up in the morning and says, "I want to be miserable, in pain and unbearable today". You are taking steps towards being healthier and that his kindness would be appreciated. Seems simple, but they do need to be reminded to be nice to others who are feeling low. Chances are, he might be feeling low and inadequate in the fact that he can't find the "magic button" to help you, his wife, and it manifests in anger.

2) I tell my husband as calmly as I can that until he receives his PHD in Psychiatry, he really is not qualified to diagnose me on a mental basis, or prescribe me medication. This statement always stops him in his tracks and since I have been using it, he really has softened up quite a bit and I hear that horrid "take a pill" statement less often these days.

This is not a bash to the men who post and read on this site at all. But there are some men that would just love to "snap their fingers to snap you out of it". Sensitivity is hard for some men, especially when their wife and partner is not doing well and they are confused about how to approach helping you. You guys got together hopefully because you were friends and had fun together. He might be confused about how to get back to that point with you during this trying time.

Verbal abuse is abuse, you may need to see a counselor. But sometimes with "not very sensitive men" their "caring" comes out as anger, and in your case, I hope it is only because he feels helpless trying to help you, the woman he vowed to stay with for life.

Best to you.

[cstrommer]

Thank you. I appreciate the advice. It's been an emotional roller coaster for us going on 3 years. I will try some of these tactics. I am super sensitive (as we all are) right now to anything and everything - I just want to get past this. I have been trying to turn my back and take a deep breath when something happens (even with the kids). That is helping a bit. Best to you as well.

[Lori]

Oh, thank you, Sarah J for putting into words what I felt but just cant seem to 'spit it out'. I have so many things I want to say, but I dont know why...maybe because my life is an open book and I welcome anyone to see something in what I say, and maybe say..."There's your problem, right there." The more you people know about me, the more advice you may have for me, and constructive criticism is good....as long as it does not come from my boyfriend... As I have stated in more than one post somewhere on this website, this weekend was miserable!! Just plain miserable. But I do feel God brings us here sometimes. Once we have hit the bottom, we have no place else to go but back up, back to WHERE WE USED TO BE!!!! Yea, I was yelling alittle. God works so mysteriously. Gosh I dont know what I want to say first. First, I need to get a life, but I will when the time is right, so bear with me...one day you may not have something to read once I have been healed and only write posts to help someone.

I thank you Sarah J for the above post! My boyfriend is mad at me, wont speak to me...ignoring me....thats the worst thing he can do to me...but anyway, I have not made life easy on him lately. My family supports me, everyone does. I was raised in the church. Being in a christian family is all so new to Jamie but he seems to crave it. He strives to be an awesome man and I thank him so much for it, but lets face it, he is a man. And I say that with alot of love in my heart. Its the same thing as I do. I am angry!! At who? Just my situation and I cant fix it, so I take it all out on my boyfriend. He cant fix me either. Men tend to think that they should be able to fix everything. He has always told me, God gave him big shoulders so that he can take care of everything...but he cant. He is angry. He is now being sarcastic with me. The poor guy has had enough.

My parents, my siblings, my children are all supportive in their own way. Hey Greybeard, I have been a good girl so far today, and have not bothered him at all and he left the house at 5:25 this morning, and he just sent me a text, checking on me. So hopefully this will be a good day for us, thanks for your encouragment. But my family has been great! Their prayers, their support, their love....amazing! My brother was just on the phone to me, helping me, giving me advice, and he has a big thing going on at work right now but he took the time to help get me turned around in the right direction. Well, he was more or less preaching, and I dont know how many of you go that route or believe in that route but I dont see any other way out of this mess than through God. I am taking advice from those who tell what supplements to take, or what foods are good for us. I am seeking advice from you who have been where I am, but I am also having to lean on God. My brother was giving some great advice and if anyone wants to know exactly what he said, you are more than welcomed to send me a private message and I will answer you.

I have a song that runs through my head all the time....all the time!! Be still and know that I am God. I was telling my brother about it and he asked me if I knew what it meant. I said yea, well I think it means, just be still be quiet and let God work in our lives. Yes and no....it means STOP STRUGGLEING!!!! I cant fix this for you if you dont let go!!! Let it go. Its like driving your car into a ditch. We cant touch it, we must leave it alone. We cant try to pull it out, we have to let God do it. To go on about our lives (what lives?) and to forget our car is stuck in the ditch.....and when God says its time, He will get the car out and give it back to you. Sounds simple but hard to do. Yes, my family has been very supportive BUT ringing my neck has entered their minds too. :cry: My family mean the world to me as you can see from my myspace.

Let me close out this post with this short story. I think it was Friday afternoon, my boyfriend was down right mean, with sarcasm. I realized the truth hurts BAD!!! I sat in a chair in the living room thinking, how much I just wanted to die. Selfish? How is that selfish when you feel like you are the one causing everyone the problems....Lori disappears, so do their problems....right? Well, I was sitting and analyzing, flirting with the thoughts of suicide, if you will....all three of my sleeping dogs came flying out of their bed, as if someone were at the door, and jumped in my lap, got comfortable and went to sleep. ALL THREE!!! I was telling my brother about it, and he said well did it work? Well, yea...I was in awe! How did they know what I was thinking? I know they are perceptive, but not that perceptive.

[Lori]

That is truly amazing, I sit here with one in my lap...the little chihuahua, the other two, dauschunds, are in danger of being rolled over by my computer chair...lol What kind of dogs do you have again, Greaybeard?

[mkhackler]

My oldest brother has been good about, with good advice. He just found out about all this last week. My son has no idea what to do, and he pretty much sucks if I ask him for anything. My other 2 brothers don't have a clue what is going on. And neither does my sister.

Everyone, except my son, live quite a ways away so it is hard to even see them.

My "true family" are my kitties, Spot and his brother Spike. They are very understanding because they are happy with me even when I yell for no reason. They give love unconditionally, as do dogs.

[Lori]

Thats great you have your older brother and he is there for you. My parents are there for me, and like alot of people, they are at a loss as to HOW to help, so they have me on a prayer chain at church, and of course telling their Sunday School Class which means I have atleast 60 plus people who are praying for me. My older brother has been wonderful with me, as has his wife. Wonderful prayer warriors. My other brother asks my parents each time he talks to them, how I am doing, as does his wife. Thats their way of 'being there for me'. Its their way of handling it. My sister was a late bloomer. She is only two years younger than me, but has a 9 year old and a 13 year old to deal with at home, plus a full time job. I say late bloomer because my kids are 26 and 18 and my grandchildren will be 7 and 3 next month. Everytime I have a really bad day, my sister is here, drops everything and is by my side. We stay in contact once or twice a week otherwise. I explained my daughter somewhere, in another post. She is my best friend until it comes to me having a really bad day, then she cant cope and stays home to pray or goes to see her best friend from her church and they pray for me. She is afraid like your son is, she knows I have taken a bottle of pills before when I was being harrassed by my ex husband and on prozac, so she has her reasons to be afraid, like your son does. My son is struggling in his own life. He lives with my abusive ex husband, and he still endures the crap I lived with for 13 years. But its his choice. Last night, my ex kicked my son and his girlfriend out of his house and they were walking down the road, during the night, to meet his girlfriends aunt who was taking them in for the night. But when I need them, they are there for me, both my son and his girlfriend.

My boyfriend on the other hand, who just texted me to make sure his daughter was good for me this morning, seemed confused when he came home in a good mood yesterday! LOL Not sure, when he opened the door if I was going to be in a snit. LOL I wasn't so he did not know how to react at first, but he finally settled down to dinner and tv. I know with his two buddies being in another state, it has gotten him down too, because when one of them called him yesterday evening it perked him up even more.

I guess he feels like he has to deal with me on his own without their support, but they are only a phone call away. He has my parents, my daughter and my brother to talk to, but its not the same having two friends to turn to, people who do not love me like my family does. He values their opinion because they are on the outside looking in.

I hope you are having a better day today. I feel as though I will.

[mkhackler]

Yes, so far (it is 8:28 am-up for an hour) I feel ok, a little stiff but that will work it's way out. Had to call my son yesterday and BEG him to get me a pack of smokes after work. Told him I had no $ for cigs and gas. He seemed a little put out about doing it, but he did. That is my support from him. I'll take it.

I should clear one big thing up. My hubby was actually my ex-hubby when he commited suicide. I still cared about him and loved him. I don't know where things went that bad in his life that he did that. I wished he had spoken with me more honestly when we did speak, because just maybe I could have helped him. His family had never had to deal with someone stuck in a deep, hardcore depression, so I am sure they just left him alone. When I was having suicidal thoughts last month, I would talk to the hubby, yes, talk to him and tell him that I would be joining him soon. Glad I did not follow through with my thoughts now . I do believe it is a selfish act to do to those who love you.

Enough of my tirade for now.

HERE'S TO A GREAT DAY TODAY AND AN EVEN BETTER ONE TOMORROW!!!!

[Lori]

I was just emailing a young girl on my myspace. She went to school with my daughter and my daughter hooked us up. But in her email she was talking about suicide thoughts and I responded by telling her, and forgive me if I am wrong. I assured her and reassured her that I can not commit suicide. It just isnt happening. Its the frustration of being the way we are right now. Fleeting thoughts about turning my steering wheel into the path of other cars, walking into the ocean, driving off a bridge, I think I am flirting with the thoughts of suicide. I cant do that to my family. I am not always going to be this way. I try so hard to live for God, why in the world would I want to hand myself to the devil, in just one stupid mistake? No,I am not going to do it. I will have my bad days again, I can count on that, but it will be just that.....a bad day!

[mkhackler]

Lori-That is me completely. Although my suicidal thoughts went way of the Cymbalta. 2 weekends on 72 hour suicial holds turned me around completely. I know I have said this before, but after the 2nd hold is when I came home, went to medicine cabinet and threw out Cymbalta and haven't looked back. I have had some rough days emotionally/mentally, but no more thoughts of suicide.

I have 3 grandsons-1 is almost 12, and the twins are 13. There grandad on mom's side killed himself when they were babies by driving high speed into a concrete barrier. Then the EX-hubby shot himself just a few short years ago. So my precious grandkids have no grandfather due to there selfish acts. I won't do that to them, or to my son. Or to my brothers and sister. Nope. Not me. Not anymore.

Lori, are you saying that you now have fleeting thoughts of suicide? If you do, please email me ASAP. I am home most of the time and check emails on regular basis. I'm no counselor, but I've been there!
Prayers are with you!

Mary in Denver

[Lori]

Thank you, Mary, and God bless your precious grandbabies. I am so sorry they do not have a grandpa, and yes, it is a very selfish act. I do not have them this week. LOL Sounds funny to speak of something so serious in such a light manor, but I have not had the thoughts since Friday night. I thank you so much for offering me your email. I am home during the day too, and most days I have no where to go.....ok, let me rephrase that, I try not to go anywhere. I am still somewhat unstable, or not feeling up to par, but I thank God for these three days of calmness I have had. I dont know how to just be thankful for them, I have to try and figure out why? The suicidal thoughts are so hard to explain. So, I wont...lol I know you are dealing with rough days too, so here is my email address....oops its not here anymore.

[Lori]

THANK YOU, Greybeard, and well, you have to admit, someone dealing with Cymbalta withdrawals could possibly be creepy....ya never know. I was not thinking....can I chalk it up to a blonde thing again? Can we delete a post? I just thought about what you just said, when I sent a personal email to someone on here, via clicking under their name. You dont miss a trick do you, GB? I normally dont but lately it takes me a while.

[schmb01]

Next to the edit button, there is an x, and you can delete your posts.

[mkhackler]

It was me. I admitt it. I put my email address in a posting. But it is gone. Sorry. Didn't have my thinking cap on.........

[Lori]

Right after I posted the response, I saw the edit button and erased my email address. And we know it was not you, Mary, it was the evil Cymbalta.
Thanks Greybeard and Babby!!

[Holly]

I think my husband would be more sympathetic about what I'm going through except that I have missed work, and he is worried about $. The rest of my family are not very supportive, except my mother and my daughter. They want to be sympathetic, but believe that I should just get on something, anything, so that I'll feel better. This is a problem when I'm trying to wean and take a break from meds. This was what I was doing, going off Effexor, when my doctor had the brilliant idea of putting me on Cymbalta to help wean from Effexor. hello.

[Attorney_Victim]

Holly,
My mom and sister are my main family support, but they don't really "get it" either. My sister keeps saying things like "you're not right...you need to find a different medication...you need therapy because something is seriously wrong with you." Well, duh!! You try taking a jillion different anti-depressants over 8 years, then suffer major withdrawal! Nobody is quite "right" when they have just come off this crazy drug!!

I truly believe that our bodies need time to heal physically from the trauma of Cymbalta. I know I still have "issues" that I need to deal with in order to have good mental health, but geez...give me some time to recover physically! Just pat me on the head and tell me it will all be okay...that's what I need right now!!

That is why this forum is so great...everybody here "gets it"! We can all help each other through the worst times, then hopefully our friends and families will be waiting with open arms, ready to welcome us back to "normal life."

[RedDog1641]

It's about the same for me, not getting any positive. " you need to call your doctor and see if he will up your Welbutran". I am recently "coming down" from Cymbolta HELL. Its not pretty. I have NO parience at all. And yes it is taking a toll with my marrage. I'm the OLNY one here at home that can't get upset or mad about anything. Icatch hell from it from the spouse. She not making it easy for me and neigher are her kids. I am just in my own little world. I read hat some have used Benedril to help with the symptoms... all that does for me is make me sleepy and dazed out. So far hasn't helped at all. Hopeing the secone week of completly being off of cymbalta hell is a little better. Thanks for the forum. It has opened up my eyes. Good luck to all.

John

[nursedeborah]

Hi,
I have never had any support during all of this except for I go to my AA meetings. It hard for me
to get close to people still, as I just feel like I am not acting right, or talking right. I am still
foggy, and had thought it was my vision, but now know it's not that.

This has been the only place I do get supportt.

Debbie

[Junior]

MadTabby

Sounds like it is your family that is screwed up. How dare they judge you like that? Whatever happened to actually SUPPORTING you, to empathising, to trying to put themselves in your shoes? Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

On the other hand.. my family really IS loopy! LOL. I mean it! Mental illness is rife. My uncle has bipolar 1, his sister (my mother) has bipolar 2 and GAD, I have Major Depressive Disorder and GAD, and my younger sister has bipolar 1 and GAD. I have a brother but he has managed to escape from all this :-I BUT... we are all very supportive of one another. We understand that the difficulties are genuine and we have all worked hard to learn how to cope with our particular disorders. So.... I put it you that is your family that has the problem...and that you are the victim here. I bet none of your family members has ever challenged anything that your drs have said or done???????????

Thinking of you
Junior

[MaureenV]

Hi Madtabby,


Can I make a suggestion? Don't tell your family what you're doing. I know from personal experience that you think you're saying something perfectly reasonable, but the response leaves you wondering why you bothered. Just don't. You're perpetually believing that by sharing the person is going to respond.

I'm quite close to both of my (older) sisters, but have told neither than I'm on HRT, much less anti-depressants. They wouldn't approve and my reasons for doing so in the first place would get lost due to their opinion that I went for the wrong solution. What I would have been looking for is affirmation of doing my best before resorting to the chemicals, but they'd hear it from the other perspective. So I just don't bother.

We (six kids) weren't brought up with 'love' as a feature, either. It was an existence more than anything else - lots have worse, but lots have better, too. My father wouldn't even drive me to my secondary school formal. I've no idea why, when I look back. He had too much alcohol in him most of the time but that wouldn't have stopped him driving - he weaved his way home from the pub most nights. I had to ask a friend if their parent could pick me up. Forty years later I can still feel the humiliation of having to make up an excuse for needing a lift. This is but one tiny example of what millions of people grow up with - a long way short of abuse, but nowhere near enough communication and love to become adults easy in their own skin.

My mother never said 'I love you', is always critical, rabbits on about all the awful things people do (like park in front of her house so that her friends drive by, think she's already got visitors so don't call in !!!!!!!!!!!!!!) (But of course in another conversation she has so friends anyway !!!, no one ever visits, this to our faces when we've spent five hours driving on a Sunday to see her).

My husband's family is like yours; when I was cuddling my daughter at about 18 months, my father-in-law gazed over fondly and said 'you two have a great bond'. I was gobsmacked, I wasn't used to hearing that sort of stuff. I could easily go away for a weekend with my mother in law. An hour in the same room as my mother is too much. At least with my mother all six siblings have an identical view:

For a laugh: The oldest brother seems to have been designated as the poor bunny who's going to convince her (at 93 and living along) to have an emergency medallion (I don't want strangers in my house!!!) and seems to be making minute progress. He said that 'you CAN pass a camel through the eye of a needle, you just need to cut it into very small pieces, and once you've done that you have to work out how to put all the bits back together again'! Extra funny. We can at least all take consolation from the fact that the offspring are not split in their understanding of it all.

regards, Maureen.

[nursedeborah]

madtabby,
Stop going to the bank for ice cream. That's what I was taught to do with
people who were not there for me emotionally!

Debbie

[MaureenV]

ha ha that's very funny, debbie.

Must remember that one.

Be good if we could get money from the ice-cream shop though, eh?



:)) Maureen.

[Junior]

With my family, if you check any of their book shelves you'll find a ton of the "think yourself rich" type books. They're critical of themselves, and they're critical of others. Being the youngest, somehow I tended to be the target for a lot of the criticism. I remember being a child and being constantly asked "do you want to grow up to be like [brother]?" whenever I screwed up. When I replied "what's wrong with [brother]?" my mother hit the roof with a tirade that included every little thing he had ever done in his life. Unfortunately I was the type of child who would believe anything that adults told me, so I absorbed all of the criticism like a sponge.

There's no support in my family, there's basically no love, we're all strangers. I'm the only one who actually speaks to everybody. My nieces and nephews have never met each other. I'm glad to hear that your family is able to pull together. It's one of the reasons I want a child; my hubbys family is so loving and caring and it would be wonderful to bring up a child with their support.

Ahhhhhhhh. So no matter what you do, it will always be wrong. Well screw them. THEY are the ones with the problem here, not you. In fact, I have no doubt that they were 99.9% the cause of Drs feeling they needed to put you on medication in the first place. Why? Because you needed someone to love you. Someone to tell you that you are a good person. Someone to validate your feelings and make you feel good about yourself. Your family weren't going to do that and I can only assume that your DR interpreted it as mental illness.

I'm so sorry this has happened to you. I knew from a very young age that I was very lucky. There was a lot of warmth and encouragement in my house. We were hugged a lot and told how much we were loved. Dad used to make a point of telling us that we were all planned and wanted. He also thanked us when we did something good, off our own backs. Mum could be a little critical, but always for the right reasons. Always because she wanted the best for us. So... since I was very young, I was aware that I had something that others didn't. If I could, I'd be a family therapist because a lot of parents just don't know to parent and when a child gets sick (mentally I mean) it can actually be that they are symptomatic on behalf of the whole family system.

Anyhow, I have to agree with Debbie. The well is dry and it's unlikely you will ever find what you are looking for there. Maybe it's better to stick with the well you have - hubby's side of the family - and get your nourishment from them.
And us... of course!!

Junior

[MaureenV]

Still getting indifference unless it affects them.
I decided to stop my Cymbalta, 90mg, a week and a half ago. I couldn't sleep. I was up until 2 or 3, and had to get up at 6 to get my daughter to school. I had never heard of the withdrawal problems, I have quit Zoloft and Prozac cold turkey with no problems. I sat down to look up Cymbalta withdrawal, and I wanted to cry. I had problems since June, but not even my doctor suggested it might be a side effect. I have been talking to my husband and grown daughter for two days about how great it is to find out the reason and that there is hope for me. I'm down to 30mg. My husband has asked me both nights in an irritated voice, "Are you coming to bed tonight?" I asked him tonight if he had heard anything I had said for the last two nights, and he said yes, but wandered off cursing under his breath. I am having withdrawal, big time, asked my daughter to pick up something easy for supper. She didn't call, or come home until 9.

Ruth, next time your husband asks if you're coming to bed, just say 'no, thought I'd go outside and howl at the moon for a bit'.


Sorry, sometimes the only response to an unthinking question is absurdity. Answering sensibly actually validates the question as being somehow 'reasonable'. Other people are also often on 'automatic', too, with their own preoccupations. I'm not excusing his behaviour, just saying that whatever you've explained obviously hasn't got through to his subconscious. In the same way that parents (esp the primary carer - usually the mother) do with toddlers, giving them 'sidestream' attention, I think this also happens with partners.

They listen, make supportive noises, but 24 hours later forget that you're still 'in' the situation.

One of the things I noticed with withdrawal was that ordinary 'insults', like your daughter's behaviour, are somehow more intense. I don't know any other way to describe it.

The bad things were twice as bad, and the good things (when they finally started to happen) were twice as good. It's like a roller coaster, which eventually starts to plateau.

All I can suggest is don't expect too much of other people. This withdrawal is truly bizarre. Of course we can expect those around us who claim to care for us to see it from our perspective, but they can't actually put themselves in our shoes. That's why this drug is so obnoxious. I have no doubt it's been responsible for many relationship breakdowns.

Hang int there, and keep in touch, regards, Maureen.