541 replies to this topic

[invalidusername]

All the more reason for maintaining a diary for the feeling that you have.

 

It is so much easier for others to see the difference in you, but much more difficult for you to see the difference in yourself.

 

This is an age-old complexity.

 

Try it and you WILL notice the difference.

 

It might have taken me 18 months, but I got there.

 

I won't lie is saying that it will be necessarily quicker than this, but neuroplasticity teaches us that the truth is out there!!!

 

IUN

[looneytune]

The pattern is now 7 or 8 good days and a few, 2 or 3, heavy duty bummers but I have a little friend....

 

Been taking a 1/4 tab of 15mg Mirtazapine (3.75mg for a week now) and it's been keeping me straight......gonna give it another week or so and see how that pans out

 

Be easy on yourself,right?

 

Hope you are all well and coping

 

xxx

[invalidusername]

Hi LT....

 

It sounds like you are on the roller-coaster and are riding it well. A 75%/25% split in favour of good days is a good thing and should be celebrated!!

 

Just look at it from a perspective of time. It has got better the longer it has gone on, so logically, it can only get better. Have faith my friend.

 

I am not coping at all, but that is another story!!

 

My best wishes to you all...

 

IUN

[invalidusername]

Hi LT...

 

Just doing the rounds, and have posted on LV's area to see how all are doing, but wanted to make sure you would see it and if not, write here so you know I wouldn't dream of leaving you out!

 

So how is it all going for you? Much like LV, there are waves going on, but this is a POSITIVE as it means that things are on the up - waves settle and get you back to where you need to be now that your system has found the right route to find the best balance of your chemicals.

 

Please keep in touch my friend - we are all here for you,

 

IUN

[looneytune]

Thanks IUN....hope all are well 

 

Wee question.....I was on Mirtazapine for around a month or so at 1/2 dose, for the most part, and stopped "cold Turkey" about a week and a half ago

 

The past few day I have been feeling somewhat agitated and depressed again and DOOMED.....is there a chance this could be the beastie Mirtazapine even although usage time was relatively short?

[fishinghat]

Unluckily a month is long enough BUT given the low dose and short time span it shouldn't last too long.

[looneytune]

Thanks all

[LeVana]

Hi Looney,

 

I think your symptoms are due to dulox WD, which were partially covered by mirta.

How many weeks/months have you been at zero dulox now?

 

greetz to all <3

(lying in bed... )

[looneytune]

LeVana

 

about 15 weeks off and not feeling great especially in the early part of the day

 

Often it resolves at night and I am fine in the later part of the day......is that normal?

 

PS only on Mirtazpine for 4 weeks

 

PPS I hope Scotland kick Germany's arse tonight and cheer me up 

 

I could sob/sob/sob with frustration but don't have whatever it takes to sob/sob/sob

[LeVana]

I also feel worse in the mornings...maybe it's the part of cortisol.

@Germany: nothing against it. arrogant guys😜

[looneytune]

Thanks LV

 

Guys......could 15/16 weeks off DUL30 (on them for 5 or 6 months) be responsible for the anxiety/depression/doom that I get time to time?

 

and are morning symptoms significant that can taper off later in the day and is this morning shit par for the course?

 

I don't think I am ever gonna be the same, or recover, and that feeling in itself is enough to raise the anxiety/depress levels even higher

[looneytune]

 

 

Guys......could 15/16 weeks off DUL30 (on them for 5 or 6 months) be responsible for the anxiety/depression/doom that I get time to time?

 

and are morning symptoms significant that can taper off later in the day and is this morning shit par for the course?

 

I don't think I am ever gonna be the same, or recover, and that feeling in itself is enough to raise the anxiety/depress levels even higher

 

 

Guys......could 15/16 weeks off DUL30 (on them for 5 or 6 months) be responsible for the anxiety/depression/doom that I get time to time?

 

and are morning symptoms significant that can taper off later in the day and is this morning anxiety par for the course?

 

I don't think I am ever gonna be the same, or recover, and that feeling in itself is enough to raise the anxiety/depress levels even higher

 

and I have just realised that since the taper stopped with DUL30 I have been feeding myself a dose of Mirtazapine when things got too hard to bear.......I would have a good week then the shit hit the fan and I would reach for the mirtazapine and take some for a few days then stop.....that's not been to helpful,has it?

 

Stopped the MIRT for good two weeks ago

[fishinghat]

"Guys......could 15/16 weeks off DUL30 (on them for 5 or 6 months) be responsible for the anxiety/depression/doom that I get time to time?

and are morning symptoms significant that can taper off later in the day and is this morning anxiety par for the course?"

 

Yes it can. I believe the daily are associated with swings in neurotransmitters, serotonin higher in the mornings and lower in the late afternoon and evenings, similar for cortisol, adrenaline fades later in the day. melatonin is higher later in the day and many more patterns like this. On top of that, there are daily swings in what you do and eat and all of that can have an effect as well.

 

 

"and I have just realised that since the taper stopped with DUL30 I have been feeding myself a dose of Mirtazapine when things got too hard to bear.......I would have a good week then the shit hit the fan and I would reach for the mirtazapine and take some for a few days then stop.....that's not been to helpful,has it?"

 

Not sure but you could be right. So much of these meds "work" but they don't really know why or how. That lack of info makes it hard to answer these types of questions.

and I have just realised that since the taper stopped with DUL30 I have been feeding myself a dose of Mirtazapine when things got too hard to bear.......I would have a good week then the shit hit the fan and I would reach for the mirtazapine and take some for a few days then stop.....that's not been to helpful,has it?

[invalidusername]

Hey all....

 

Great to hear from you all. Really tough week this end and trying my best to keep going despite the news earlier in the week. Just feel like staying in bed all day and let the world pass me by. 

 

Let other people deal with their lives and I will just ignore everything and shut the world out. 

 

I am ashamed to say that on Monday and Tuesday, I had a fair bit to drink telling myself that this is what people do when their friends die.

 

But got myself together on Wednesday and haven't gone back.

 

@Looney

As serotonin levels are at their peak in the morning (or when it should be...), people often find they feel better as they day goes on. The in the evening you are working on meltonin is our bodies "chill out" neurochemical so bedtime is usually the best time of the day.

 

Regarding the Mirt - I agree with Hat. It doesn't have much of a withdrawal as it is, and only being on it 4 weeks it unlikely to do much and as LV said, it culd very easily be the Dulox up to its old tricks again. You are coming on 4 months now, so the rollercoaster should be evening out a little, but can still take some time.

 

@LV

Sorry that you have also found yourself lying in bed. I understand your elongated withdrawal is really having an effect on you as the time stretches out, but keep looking for those better "windows" - they will becme more frequent now we have seen then, but it can seem like forever looking from the inside.

 

Please take care.

 

...and sorry about the football score Looney!! That must have been painful along with everyting else...!

[looneytune]

IUN Sorry about your friend man...life can be very tough indeed......and challenging. You take care and try and relax

 

Meanwhile, in the looney ward....

 

RE the MIRTAZAPINE thing and could it's stoppage be effecting me

 

I just checked my PC diary and was stunned to find out I have been using MIRT once or twice a week...sometimes for days in a rows, and quite recently 4 weeks in a row with only a single 4 week spell off them since January, 6 months ago. Generally 1/2 doses but it does still knock you out. I guess this withdraw could be affecting me,yeah? I am now two weeks off them with a simple Cold Turkey stoppage due to low dose and sparse use....thoughts Guys?

 

 

 

My Sister is gravely ill and does not have much time left I expect and when I think of this I get sick to my stomach. Since I moved away from home I do not see Sister much and when I do visit her I am rocked to the core with her appearance. It's so bad I actually considered abandoning her by not visiting again

[LeVana]

oh no, Looney, don't let her alone. you could regret this decision.

[looneytune]

Yeah LV i would never do that but it just shows my state of mind when I actually considered it for a second

 

Her bravery is astonishing and blows me away

[fishinghat]

Yes Looney, Mirt does have a withdrawal but fairly mild and your use was small and intermittent so its effects should not be too bad BUT... having said that your nerves are very sensitive and vulnerable now with the Cymbalta withdrawal so that will certainly not help.

 

Sorry to hear about your sister. That is too bad. My brother died from cancer several years back and it was really hard to deal with. I know you will be there for her and you will come back from the ordeal eventually. just be kind to yourself during this time and try not to put too much stress on yourself.

 

Best wishes and prayers.

[looneytune]

I always think that the latter stages of DUL30 WD were much easier than the actual stoppage and subsequent weeks/months when I was free of drug...in other words,the anxiety seemed to ramp up after all the WD and taper periods were over...this make sense?

[invalidusername]

Thanks for your kind words Looney - and I know what you are saying about your sister - its a fleeting thought but we all know that thoughts can be complete bastards sometimes. We don't want them but they stick around anyway, usually when we least want them. But I really hope that she does not suffer for everybody's sake in your family. You have my sympathies.

 

Unfortunately, post-withdrawal symptoms are very real and they do come back a bite you when you feel all should be said and done, but they do not last, it is your body going back through some changes and it can often happen when there is more going on in your life, so as Hat said, you really need to look after yourself and avoid stressful situations at all costs.

[looneytune]

Thanks so much ALL of you...Hat, LV and IUN, very often I rush to the PC or sit here in anticipation for a reply from either of you

 

You have all been very helpful and kind,bless

 

John

 

xxx

 

LV yer team were lucky IMO

 

[looneytune]

LV

 

How are you doing girl?

 

John

[invalidusername]

We're always here for you John...

 

Over the years, I have had some of the most amazing moments reading posts and messages on the forum. 

 

I remember once in December... 2019, I think, the forum went down for three days and there was such upset and panic! When it came back on, it turns out that everyone was trying to get in touch with the owner, the site hosting company... We were totally lost without each other...

 

You remember that Hat?

 

When we had FL, LDN, and of course our dear Gail...

[fishinghat]

I remember

 

When I went through my withdrawal a lot of people "held my hand" through that. I would have been lost without that.

[looneytune]

LV

 

A wee update on yourself please...how are you doing?

 

John

 

x

[invalidusername]

I remember

 

When I went through my withdrawal a lot of people "held my hand" through that. I would have been lost without that.

 

Just like you did with me. 

 

I know I was a while behind joining the team here, but without Gail and yourself (among many others), I would have been screwed. And it was that which got me to my training and knowledge to be granted an admin.

 

Just like yourself, Hat, I don't like to see anyone suffer in the same way that we did and will do all we can in our power to help such people through their issues. It is what LDN refers to the "Christ consciousness" that exists in us. 

[invalidusername]

Hey guys...

 

How is everyone doing? Always thinking about you and always nice to hear from you.

 

Take care y'all,

 

IUN

[LeVana]

still alive, IUN...but no really progress I could tell. don't want to annoy you with same symptoms 😵‍💫

windows and waves are extremely difficult to handle. last three days i lay in bed all the time with crying, shaking, brain zaps, muscle cramps, anxiety and severe dystonia. today it seems to be a little bit better.

it's a long, long way to heal :-(

greetz <3

[fishinghat]

God bless LeVana. Hugs and prayers.

[invalidusername]

Hi LV - don't worry about reporting similar progress - it is just nice to know you are still going on. It is also somehow comforting that other people are often going through similar circumstances and understand. 

 

I really feel sorry for you over the last three days however. I DO remember those days - well, months in some cases - and I know that Hat had a very intimate relationship with his bedroom cupboard - I am sure he won't mind he saying. We have all had some VERY rough times, but we are ALL still here. 

 

However long it takes to heal, you need people to be there for you, and that is what we are here for.

 

I'm currently freaking out and my health anxiety is at its worst. I had some weird blur develop in my left eye vision. They need to do more tests, but it might involve laser surgery... in my eye... and that totally scares me. I don't like the idea of having a laser being shot into my eye. Or at worst it is a retinal tear from the back of my eye and I can't even write what that involves as I will break into a full blown panic attack.

 

We need to keep strong my dear... 

 

Take care and stay in touch,

 

IUN