109 replies to this topic

[Iratxe]

hi,
Thank you both again.
I do not have good news.
On Monday and after talking to the psychiatrist about my sensitivity to the effects of the medication, he gave me a very low dose of intramuscular ketamine, I didn't even notice anything. But at night I felt more agitated than usual. On Tuesday the dose was higher, it was going to be by vein but the machine didn't work so it was intramuscular again. This time I did notice it, it was a good sensation of relaxation and happiness but no any kind of trip.
Wednesday was a rest day. Both Tuesday afternoon and Wednesday I felt more intense sensations than usual. The psychiatrist said that it was not unusual for this to happen, but that being so, it was better not to give more than two doses per week. So we came back home, with two small doses and feeling sad and upset.
He proposed us to return in a week or two for another two higher doses (always accompanied by integration therapy through acceptance and commitment therapy). But we can't travel 600 km for two days whenever we want,and for now, the experience has not been good. I don't konw what to do, but I know that I don't want to think about ketamine for a while.
IUN, I have read also two books of Dr Claire Weekes. I thought my anxiety problems were more or less over, but after the benzodiazepine withdrawal syndrome I don't know where I am anymore.
I need time to see how I evolve.
I'll tell you what I decide to do. I also have to decide if I start with the titration of alprazolam, although right now I have no strength. I hope better times will come.

[Iratxe]

IUN, I forgot to ask you about the books of Dr Claire Weekes. Which are the books you read?

[invalidusername]

Drop me a personal message and I can help you find all you need

 

Trust me, it will be well worth it...

 

IUN

[fishinghat]

Sorry to hear that the ketamine treatments are not going any better. Just keep your hope up and work with your dr. It sounds like he/she has your best interest in mind.

 

"I need time to see how I evolve."

You definitely need to stabilize. Just deal with the Ketamine issue for now and be patient.

"I also have to decide if I start with the titration of alprazolam, although right now I have no strength."

Definitely wait on the benzo. There will be time for that later. ALL withdrawals should be begun from a point of strength. They are difficult enough without being in a weakened state when starting one. 

 

Time and patience.

[Iratxe]

I am getting even worse, I can't believe it. I want to stay all day in bed. I feel like the withdrawal symtoms of Cymbalta are in its maximun strenght (more than a year later of the last drop). I have made a good mix with two withdrawals togethar and the ketamine. It is unbearable and I am worried about the way I feel.
You are right FH, I only can do one thing, WAIT.

[fishinghat]

Doing more than one change at a time is often a recipe for disaster but when you are suffering we all get desperate. You can survive this. You might want to review the ebook and consider some of the supplements that might help you get through this. 

[invalidusername]

I doubt there would be any way of finding out the dose they gave you, but it was probably a pathetic small amount. The idea is that they put you fuller under and it resets your neuro pathways. What you are talking about are the little top-ups that you have following the big dose - it is unlikely to work. Sorry to hear that, but at least I can give you a reason. 

 

Unless they are going to fully knock you out with the stuff, it is not worth getting worked up about. My apologies, I thought you were having the full blown treatment. That has a far higher chance of working. You could always ask them why they have not given you option of this.

 

So sorry to hear what you are going through, but what you are feeling is quite normal after these doses. This type of methodology has not been given nearly enough research. You may as well have gone to the dentist and asked for a small vial of nitrous oxide....

 

I can give you more information on the above it needed....

 

IUN

[Iratxe]

I am waiting for them to send me a report where the doses they gave me will appear.
They decided to start with a small dose and work their way up because of my sensitivity to the medications.
When after the second dose it was seen that I was worse, they told me that it was better to wait a week or two before continuing with higher doses, because in the situation I was in, the following doses were not going to work. They told me also that in the meantime it was very important that I continued in online therapy with them. I don't like online therapy. And it is not easy for us to organize the travel for two days any week.

I have the opportunity to go back and continue with another two higher doses when that time passes. But I worry about getting even worse.

Do you think it is a goog idea to go back for two full dosis?
Any information you can give me will be welcome.
Thanks.
Iratxe.

[Iratxe]

IUN, forget the ketamine question. The doctors of the ketamine clinic say that in my state is not convenient to continue with ketamine sessions.
Thanks anyway.
Iratxe.

[invalidusername]

It all comes down to the cost of it all. 

 

If you were to be taken on for the full treatment, you would first need to be weaned off the anti depressant medication. This is the normal course of things.

 

Have you asked them why they have not considered this route?

 

IUN 

[Iratxe]

No, we haven't talked about withdrawing the antidepressant. We have talked about benzodiazepines. It has been shown that benzodiazepines reduce the effectiveness of ketamine but since I am addicted to them, it was impossible to withdraw them in a short period of time.
On the second day, I think the dose they administered to me, 0.5mg/kg, is common. But with 4mgs of Xanax Retard a day....

Iratxe.

[invalidusername]

Yup...

 

It is a hard push but all previous meds need to be near to withdrawal if not gone before this is administered. 

 

I wouldn't even given the levels you speak about the time of day. So any doctors do not now how this stuff works. 

 

Again, I can explain further, but it is not your fault that this has not worked. You should have been told by the doctors, if they knew, that there was a very slight chance of this type of administration working.

 

Again, I am really sorry,

 

IUN

[Iratxe]

Thanks IUN, but I want to forget about the ketamine thing.
I just want to let time pass and see how I evolve.
Although, actually, I have very little patience, and soon, I will be thinking in some other experiment...
Iratxe.

[fishinghat]

Oh, how well I understand that way of thinking. lol

[invalidusername]

Thanks IUN, but I want to forget about the ketamine thing.
I just want to let time pass and see how I evolve.
Although, actually, I have very little patience, and soon, I will be thinking in some other experiment...
Iratxe.

 

What sort of other experiment are you thinking of?

 

I truly HATE it when the so-called doctors screw things up. You should have never been put through this.

 

Why can they not read up on the relevant research before going ahead with it?!

 

It makes me so MAD!! Sorry for the rant. It is being a doctoral researcher brings it out in me. Sure you need some intelligence, but how much does it take to think... "hmmm.. better read up on the latest practise on this one..."?

 

ARAGRAGRHAGARHAGRHRGAHRAGRAHRGAHRAGRHARH   

[fishinghat]

Amen Amen to all that IUN said. Do the research!!

[invalidusername]

Hat speaks the truth!!

 

I read these papers all the time. There are even documentaries available on youtube regarding the practises of these sorts of moving forward in mental health. It WON'T WORK if you are still on medication. How much simpler can you put it?!

 

It is the same as Psilocybin... it can work wonders!! But you CANNOT take it whilst you are still on meds.

 

It is SO SO tough to come off the meds so that you can undergo this sort of treatment, but in my opinion, it is worth it. There have been some very positive results. But you need to be guided by the right medical team. And you were NOT.

 

Please trust me. I would never lie to someone like yourself where I (and Hat) and many others have been. 

 

As I have said previously, I am a research scientist, and this really interests me... why? Because I am STUCK on Citalopram. And I have a wife who is STUCK on Venlafaxine. You can't take this stuff for the rest of your life. 

 

The big pharma's would have you believe that this is the way to go. Just like a diabetic need insulin, someone prone to depression/anxiety needs anti-depressants - bullsh!t. Nonsense. Don't believe it. I am not one of those crazy nuts, but it really is about the almighty dollar. I should know but the amount of funding $$$ I have tried to get. 

 

It sucks. We have to be out own guinea pigs to a lot of the extent of these things because we are not being guided in the right direction.

 

IUN 

[Iratxe]

I completely agree with everything you say.
I am also a researcher and I fully understand what you mean. My current psychiatrist, I have had several, is guided by what the representatives of the pharmaceutical companies tell her, it is unfortunate. But at least she takes my opinion into account, not like the previous one, that ruined me with the speed of the reducction of the cymbalta dosis first and the Xanax later.

My psychiatrist didn't know anything about the ketamine therapy to help me to make a good decission.
The ketamine thing was desperate, and to make matters worse now I feel worse. And it was not cheap the experiment!

My psychotherapist does MDMA therapy. I took it once last July and it did not hurt me. This is at home and it is not expensive. I know it should be taken without antidepressants... he thinks it will do me good. He has experience of years using it.

But actually what I have in mind is to start lowering the xanax dosis. I think if I don't, I'll never get out of this. But it is true that I am at the limit. Just to speak it's a big effort right now. I am not able to do any research about anything!

Thank you for being here to help.
Iratxe.

[Iratxe]

Hi,
I haven't done any experiments, I definitely want to wait. We'll see what my psychiatrist says on May 2, surely he wants me to take antipsychotics.
A question. Since February 17 I have lost 5 kg more. Can that still affect me due to the cymbalta stored in fat? I have been taking only 10 beads for more than a year.

Iratxe.

[fishinghat]

I have seen this type of weight loss in other members who are on a low dose and it often presents them with a mini withdrawal event BUT considering you have not had a dose change in over a year I would not expect an affect. Any Cymbalta stored in your fat tissue should be minimal by now.