20 replies to this topic

[JamieBlyth]

Ok. On finding this site, I wept. Other people suffer too. And this, Im sorry, but its really really reassuring for me. This is what i've needed to see! Ive been on this wretched drug for about 20 years i reckon. My dose has gone from 30mg to 60mg to 120mg. Chronic Depression. PTSD... blah blah. But the real problem was addiction. 
My dose went up to about 150 (i think) when i gave up drink and illegal drugs (my self prescribed medicine) in 2016 following an attempted suicide by hanging...  Without d&d my life improved immeasurably. So i figured i could come off the meds (i had a feeling that the drink and the drugs were creating the depression, and given id never been totally honest about my abuse id willingly accepted medication).  But no doctor would support me. Which feels criminal, having read what i've read on here. 

 

Anyway. To the point:
I have been personally tapering down for 5 years, and am now down to 30mg... but cannot get across the line. Im currently on 30mg every 3 days  and retake as soon as the side fx kick in. Its horrible. Its like my body is wrapped in an electric fence. And i just want to be free of this poison. 

I read about Bead counting.... so can someone clarify? Can i just remove 5-10 beads from each capsule every 3 days (in my case), and reduce like that? To finally rid myself of satans grasp? 

ANy help or advice would be most welcome. And i wish you all the very very best. 

Love and Light. 

Jamie 

 

[fishinghat]

Welcome JB

 

You have taken strong steps to recover so far and I applaude your courage.

 

The first thing I would like to mention is the every 3 day schedule is not the way to go. Cymbalta has a half life of 12 hours so 12 hours after your dose one half has left your body and 24 hours after your dose there is only 12.5% left in your body. After 3 days there is only about 0.8% of the Cymbalta left in your system and you are entering complete withdrawal. At the 3 day mark you again boost your Cymbalta level back up by taking the next dose to only repeat the same withdrawal over again. 

 

Most, but not all, brands contain around 300 beads. You will have to open a capsule or two and count those little beads to do the bead counting. Just for the sake of our discussion lets say that your brand has 300 beads. Each morning you can open a capsule and remove 1 more bead than the day before. So specifically, on day one remove 1 bead and put the capsule back together and take the dose. Day two open the next capsule and take out two beads, reclose the capsule and take that dose. Day three take out 3 beads, and on day 4 remove 4 beads etc. As your withdrawal proceeds you can increase or decrease the number of beads yoou remove each day depending on how you feel. 

 

I would also encourage you to read through our free ebook. It is a collection of medical research,  members comments on their experiences, information on supplements and much more. It can be located in the first thread in the "Medical Support" section of the forums.

 

We are here to help JB so don't hesitate to ask questions or just come here to vent. We have been through this and understand.

[JamieBlyth]

Thank you. From the bottom of my heart. Thank you.
I shall take your advice. And let you know how i get on. 

I am so grateful. 
J

[fishinghat]

Anytime sir. Best of luck and keep us posted as that is how we learn is by others experiences.

[invalidusername]

Hi Jamie,

 

A brave soul indeed to bear your innermost, and there is never any judgement here - be it drink, drugs, or anything of the sort. We recognise addiction, and a lot of us have been there. You are most certainly not alone.

 

You have done a great job with your withdrawal so far and I knew what Hat had written before I finished your message. You would have had the exact same response from myself. 

 

Again As Hat said, our eBook has been compiled for people such as yourself to have a browse to find some supplements which you may feel would best help through your journey over the next few months. You can find the link to the latest copy here;

 

https://www.cymbalta...tion-the-ebook/

 

If you need help with regards to finding something that would best suit your situation, please ask and we will guide you. It sounds like you have been through an awful lot, and suffered in silence. Don't be a stranger here Jamie. We are all friends here.

 

God Bless

 

IUN

[JamieBlyth]

Dear All,

It is two weeks since i last wrote, and following your advice i cut straight to the chase and started bead counting, with a new found optimism and belief that i could do it. Typical addict behaviour- ive pushed the boundaries slightly... but....

GOOD NEWS so far. 

 

Bead counting: This was a brilliant exercise in mindfulness; ideal given i am on a thirty day silent retreat, by myself, cut off from the world. 

 

Over the past 2 weeks i have conducted an 'accelerated' programme.

Each day i have removed 18-20 grains of poison, meaning this morning i took my last pill. 

To mitigate the withdrawal i have been taking a huge amount of exercise-

running, hiking (5-15km daily)
and swimming (every day x 2)

Sunshine.
Healthy diet- only vegetables, fruit, white meat

over 2l of water daily. 

30 minute Cold water immersion daily (10-13 degrees). 
Breathing exercises. 
Meditation. Deep. 

Mindfulness exercises.

Drawing. 

Writing. 

Been craving sex and human contact but this is a no-go.   

I have also:

Stopped smoking (25 per day for years!)

Quit sugar too.

Reading the book was fascinating- the feedback of members, and the detail and effort you've put into it is mesmerising, Herculean, and truly incredible. 

The 'only' side effects i have experienced have been:

 

Insomnia and intense sweating/fever over night. This has been really nasty... and deeply troubling, but last night I enjoyed my best nights sleep in months and months...if not years.  Im just praying i've done enough to stay on top of this. 

Assuming all goes well i will be saying good bye to this confounded drug as the last grains work their way into and out of my system. 

Next i want to write to CEO David Ricks of Eli Lilly and ask him if he'd like to make a charitable donation to a Suicide/Mental Health Charity from his $24m p.a. pay package as retribution for the millions affected by his evil, satanic concoction.  Or perhaps he could contribute to here...? 
IF i hadnt pursued a spiritual path, I would also want to take my GP to court for giving me a drug that i am certain contributed to my suicide attempt. 

I'd like to make a donation to your page. I would prefer to make it a 'one-off', rather than a repeater (at the moment), if thats ok? IF i ever make a huge amount of money, i will remember you. 

With thanks, and best wishes, love and light to you all. 

Jamie 
 

 

[fishinghat]

I am certainly impressed with your approach to this. I have no issues with your efforts to deal with the withdrawal but would add that heavy excercise often makes the withdrawal worse but if you are not having any problems exercising then by all means proceed.

 

The extreme interest in sex is very common but luckily usually lasts only a few days. 

 

As far as a donation to the page I am sure that Ken (administrator) would deeply appreciate it. He will probably contact you on this matter.

[invalidusername]

Hi Jamie,

 

Thanks ever so for the update - I was wondering how you were getting on. 

 

You really have done everything on the withdrawal list! So glad that you have reaped the rewards of your efforts too. It can take a lot of diligence to even do 25% of that list, so my heartiest congratulations. 

 

So if today was the last pill, then next two weeks will be telling you a lot. You will probably find that as you go over the next three days (the point when almost all of that last dose has gone) you might feel a bit of a sting. You get past this point and my guess is that it will be easier from there on in. 

 

Prepare to give some self-compassion during these next 2 weeks. Your brain will be doing a lot of changing and catching up. You are likely to have a few more symptoms, but they will pass, and there are plenty of remedies which can help if required.

 

Regarding David Ricks, I am sure he is aware of our little forum here as it catches a fair few people coming off the drug and we appear on search engines for a lot of search phrases. But mental health litigation is a tough one to pull off, and it often one that rarely finds success as it becomes very subjective to the individual. Its a lot of stress - something you really don't want coming off this drug. Life is too short my friend. 

 

Very kind of you to offer a dontation to the page. Short of the hosting of the site, we don't have the need for anything else, so it would be best making that donation with our best wishes to a suicide prevention charity. Over here in the UK we have the Samaritans which are amazing. They are run purely on donations, yet the NHS direct people to them as if it were government funded. It is really immoral. 

 

But to end on a high note, I am very happy to see the progress you have made and your words about the eBook are much appreciated. Hat and myself maintain this purely for the purpose it served you, so we are always grateful to hear from people such as yourself where it has served its purpose well.

 

Please let us know how you get on over the next few days and again, if we can help as you get the last of this horrible stuff out!!

 

God Bless

 

IUN

[JamieBlyth]

Good evening...

I thought i better give you an update; i thought it might help me as much as anything- im feeling pretty down right now, particularly at night- bruised and battered and the brain zaps are terrible. Sweating profusely and sleep is incredibly difficult.  During the day im able to keep busy- a lot of exercise, healthy eating, swimming- and unpicking my behaviour, mood and feelings. its at night that i really notice the zaps. 
Im too stubborn to put even one tiny bead in my body to help me feel better. You couldnt pay me to do it. 
I just wanted to share this. And let you know im still alive. A bit tearful, but i think thats more out of the knowledge that im able to channel it somewhere (here). 

I am actually British. i live in London, normally. I came to Cape Town because my mental health couldn't cope with lockdown in London! It was a good decision, i think. Its certainly given me the environment, climate, and enthusiasm to kick the dulox. 

I also dont want to rock an apple cart here and please recognise my motives as well meaning- i work in a form of neuropsychological screening. My own work on myself and studying other peoples behaviours and strategys within the brain leads me to believe that there are so so so many more practical things we can do with our lives to improve them and negate the need for anti-depressants. Medication appears to me to be the way society neutralises people who dare to think outside the box. Lifestyle and happiness can be achieved with self belief and awareness. I pray that my own journey will support my theory.... and you guys will be the first to know! God Willing.

With best wishes to you all, and ongoing thanks for everything. i would not be here without you. 

JAmie 

[fishinghat]

Hi Jamie, good post. 

 

As far as "Medication appears to me to be the way society neutralises people", thought provoking and certainly seems well meaning. I have had so many conversations with pdocs over the years as well as a lot of dr patient interactions and it has always amazed me just how many aptients come into the drs office and request certain medications. Usually benzos or a specific antidepressant. There usual reasoning is that 'it made my freind *** feel better so I thought it would help me' or 'I saw an add for it on TV and thought I would give it a try'. Many of these people seem to think that any negative feeling is unacceptable. Life can be tough and just because you have off days does not neccesarily mean you need a psych med. 

 

Many drs refer patients for psychological traing (CBT, mindfulness, etc) but patients refuse because they simply 'do not have time' and just 'want a pill to make them feel better.  Sad. We have so far to go in getting society to understand mental health issues. 

[vidiot]

Hey folks ... been on duloxetine 30mg several years. I had no idea this was such a powerful drug. Would have never started. I really thought I could just stop -- that's not happening. I skipped my dose on Thursday nite and again on Friday nite --- WHAM  -- after almost no sleep Saturday morning was a wake-up call. Two hours after getting miserably around --- I took a dose. Yes things eased up but I was a zombie. After dosing off while playing with the grand babies I realized it was all about this demon.

I been reading as much of this page as I could but now I have questions.

Where is ebook?

Does anyone know the amount of beads in a 30mg dose?

Is the one a day plus one a day the recommended way?

BTW:: the first day without this stuff I really felt like my old self...I'm 70

[fishinghat]

welcome vidiot

 

The ebook can be found in the first thread in the Medical Support section of the forum.

 

The number of beads vary a lot depending on the brand, the dose and even what factory was used. Unluckily that means it is necessary to count the beads in each new batch you purchase.

 

Dropping one extra bead each day is a good beginning. After a while and you see how you react then you can speed up or slow down as needed. Be aware that the last 5 to 10 beads are real tough and can take a month or more to finish off these. 

 

There is a lot in the ebook so if you have questions feel free to ask. We are here to help.

[JamieBlyth]

Good Luck with it.... Vidiot/Newbie! Let me smother you with best wishes for a comfortable journey ahead.  

 

A quick update from me- yesterday the zaps were crippling. I tried all day to sleep, but had the most horrific nightmares (during the day!). Very weird indeed. 
Ive actually forgotten what its like to not have zaps.... but still feel determined to see this through, come what may. 

I feel deep deep deeeeeep resentment for being prescribed these pills. i know i must let go of the resentment, and do, but it feels criminal. How can this be classified as medicine (assuming it is a medicine?)??? I suspect being hyper emotional is another withdrawal side effect? Im crying a lot for no particular reason... but crucially i am not depressed. 

Im allowed to speak to humans in person for the first time in 30 days tomorrow (ive been on a silent retreat to liberate my soul). Im pretty excited about that. I am exercising daily- swimming and running. A lot. But it keeps me busy, fit, and mentally free. 

Good evening all, and thanks again. 

James

[fishinghat]

Hi James

 

Indeed hyper-emotional is a classic symptom. Have you tried any of the supplements in the ebook for the brain zaps? I think you are taking omega 3, anything else?

[confused2021]

Hi James

 

Thank you for sharing your story. 

 

I would really love your insights into PTSD - I was getting zero symptoms but since I've gone from 60mg to 30mg my PTSD is terrible. I've never had it this bad. 

 

How did you get around this please?

 

Thanks 

Confused :-( 

[fishinghat]

Confused, have you tried any of the supplements mentioned in the ebook? Many have helped members a lot. Also there are a few prescription medicines that do NOT have withdrawal that can be very effective. 

[confused2021]

Hi Fishing Hat

 

Yes I am taking Omega 3 and Ashwanga, that's all, I'm going to spend today having a more comprehensive read of the e-book - very impressive by the way :-) 

 

Thank you again for your free, heartfelt advice, I will be making a donation.

 

Confused

[invalidusername]

Hi Confused,

 

Just realised that you had posted here having followed up in your other post, so you have answered my question regarding supplements. Regarding the Ashwagandha, I would highly recommend the KSM-66 as it is a far better substance being created from the finest parts of the root which can guarantee a standardised dose - it is far more potent as a result. 

 

Thank you for your kind words about the eBook. Hat and myself have put it together to help people like yourself, so it is lovely to hear that it is serving its purpose! You will find some very useful information relating to potential supplements to aid your situation.

 

IUN

[JamieBlyth]

Good evening! 
I thought id drop by and give you an update. 
Im doing well. I went through a few days of nearly no zaps, but over the past few days they have increased... which is strange. They're also all over my body. Im also getting very very itchy skin again too, and coming up in welts. This may not be connected- i used to take antihistamines daily but stopped those too when i stopped the cymbalta.  Im also crying at anything remotely sad. BUt i am maybe just in touch with my feelings for the first time in my adult life....

I KNOW im winning this war. The w/d syptoms are minimal compared to what they were, and i am feeling just a million times better. I dont feel remotely depressed.... 
Still exercising, swimming, eating healthily, breathing exervcises and meditation. Life is good. This drug is poison- for anyone out there joining the journey- don't give up- you CAN do it.

Confused- i sent you a PM with my email address- im very happy to share my experience on PTSD and how ive tackled it. 
Cheers,

JB

[fishinghat]

Great post JB. Sounds like you are doing well for this stage of the withdrawal. I remember the emotional swings/ One minute crying my eyes out for no reason and the next bad episodes of anger. It does subside. Hang in there.

[invalidusername]

Hi Jamie,

 

Great to hear from you - and it sounds like you have the much needed perspective at this point in your journey. Focusing on what has become better rather than the occasional new symptom popping up here and there. 

 

The brain zaps will come and go - they seem to have a mind of their own, but the periods will dissipate as the length of each episode becomes shorter. The itchy skin is more common that most would attribute to the withdrawal, but equally could be the cessation of the antihistamine. You will need to see if it continues in a few weeks. 

 

I had a significant problem with urticaria some time ago which was tied in with my Citalopram, and as I am allergic to antihistamines it was not a good time for me! But we get through it as you say!

 

Well done and keep plodding on!

 

IUN